CAPS 6 Mikayla Pate

Intercultural relationships have so many positives, although there can be negatives associated with them. I am currently in an intercultural relationship with my finace', Terence. Terence is African American and grew up in a much different way, which a much different, and larger family than I did. I am Caucasian, and grew up in a very small family that wasn't very close. I love the differences that are present and they give me an opportunity to look at different lifestyles and other cultures.  According to Martin & Nakayama , “the benefits of such relationships include acquiring knowledge about the world, breaking stereotypes, and acquiring new skills” (p. 391) These benefits aren't always immediate. This is true in my case. When Terence and I first started dating over four years ago our families both stuck to their beliefs in stereotypes, it was hard to break them, at times, they still go back to them which shows they aren't completely diminished. There are all types of differences between us, and our families. They include, but are not limited to living conditions/arrangements, holidays and how they are celebrated, expectations, money, and relationships. Both families have different priorities that stem from what each culture deems as important.“The static-dynamic dialectic suggests that people and relationships are constantly in flux, responding to various personal and contextual dynamics” (p. 400). This is relevant to our relationship because of the degree of differences that is present in each of our respective cultures. This dialect shows that we each adjust in regards to how we want others (in our case the other's family) to perceive us.  The history/past-present/future dialect is also relevant. Each of the culutral/racial groups that we associate ourselves with (African American & Caucasian)  have stigmas and sterotypes and assumptions made about that group. We have to work to break those stigmas and sterotypes. The differences/similarities dialect is perhaps the most important dialect that is relevant to our intercultural relationship. It is very necessary to look at the differences and similarites that are present and relevant to our relationship, they help us understand the "why". It shows that we shouldn't focus on the differences because that will lead to the reinforcement of stereotyping, but that culural differences do need be honored so new problems aren't created.