CAPS #6 Christian Boehm

My friend Kaycee Harriman 

This past year I’ve developed an Intercultural Relationship with a remarkable little girl named Kaycee Harriman.  I met Kaycee when our family was helping Kaycee’s family due to her brother going through cancer treatment.  Although Kaycee is only six years old she is extremely smart for her age and understands the stress her parents are going through due to cancer.  After many hours of helping Kaycee with school rides, babysitting, taking her to the movie theatres I realized that her friendship opened up my world by her innocents and view of just being a little girl.  According to Martin and Nakayama, the benefits of such relationships include, “acquiring knowledge about the world, breaking stereotypes and acquiring new skills.”(page 391).  Kaycee has taught me this and much more.

Over the past year I’ve learned a lot from Kaycee. She speaks the truth about her feelings and how she feels.  She expresses her concern for her brother and parents, but most of all she has taught me how to smile more and be happy.  Her friendship has helped me examine my own world in that I need to be more appreciative. She makes me laugh.  I only hope that my friendship has helped her in the sense she feels more comfort due to her family situation. 

To date Kaycee’s brother is doing much better and our family is not needed as much, which is a good thing, however; I still visit Kaycee to say hello and talk to her on the phone. Despite the age difference I see this friendship continuing.  I’m hopeful I’ll be able to give her advice as she gets older and she’ll continue to open up my heart by her goodness in people.

Researcher Leslie Baxter outlines a dialectical model explaining the dynamics of relationships.  Two of her dialectic approaches touches on the relationship of my friendship with Kaycee Harriman.  The Privilege-Disadvantage Dialectic according to Martin and Nakayana “are that people may be simultaneously privileged and disadvantaged, or privileged in some contexts and disadvantaged in others” (page, 399).  This relates to my friendship with Kaycee in that I’m Privileged at this point that our family or I is not going through a traumatic experience.  My friend Kaycee who is only six is disadvantaged in that she does not have a lot of experience in dealing with certain difficult situations. I’m hopeful that I can help with this process.  The other Baxter Dialectic trait that relates to my friendship with Kaycee is the Static-Dynamic Dialectic. Kaycee will soon develop strong relationships as she enters into young adulthood.  Our friendship will be in flux simply because of the age difference. In the meantime, that’s ok because I will always be there for here like a big brother. This particular Dialectic according to Martin and Nakayama, “suggests that people and relationships are constantly in flux, responding to various personal and contextual dynamics” (page 400)

Overall, my friendship with Kaycee makes me a better person and I hope I’ve been able to help her through some difficult days.  She is precious and someone who will be very successful.     

  

Kaycee helping me with groceries.

Reference:

Martin, J.N. & Nakayama, T.K. (2013). Intercultural communications in contexts (6^th ed.) New York, NY: McGraw Hill.